I got up at 6 AM this morning and played a couple tunes then I ran down to the store with my significant other and of course I brought the correct CD for the short drive, adjusted the balance and fade, and insisted that one particular song/section be paid particular attention to.
She snapped back at me that I was "obsessed" with my music and my system! She was not playing!
Well of course I could not understand this reaction as I took the day off yesterday and spent the entire day going from dealer to dealer to see what was new and had taken her along!
Well let it suffice to say she is not happy and I am at a loss.
What should I do?
Flowers? dinner?
Is she right, obsessed?
Should I seek help?
I look forward to some guidance from the group.
Thanks in advance
eljr

(by the way does anyone know much about a speaker brand I discovered yesterday, Dali?

If you only have time to answer one question please let me know about the speakers ;) )

To be brutally honest here.....you can do all of the above things flowers and such but those are only really temporary solutions. Myself, I would sit her down and explain that this is what you are, period. I get really irked at women who give their men a ration of grief regarding this thing we do. Shit man, we could all be out drinking every night, closing down the local taverns and chasing women. Fact is we are not, we are a group of pretty classy, hard working and honest folks who love music and the gear associated with it. Were not out smoking crack and robbing liquor stores......(rant over)
sigh......

If you only have time to answer one question please let me know about the speakers ;) )
Case closed.:thmbsp:

Just turn the music up louder and hope she gives up.

To be brutally honest here.....you can do all of the above things flowers and such but those are only really temporary solutions. Myself, I would sit her down and explain that this is what you are, period. I get really irked at women who give their men a ration of grief regarding this thing we do. Shit man, we could all be out drinking every night, closing down the local taverns and chasing women. Fact is we are not, we are a group of pretty classy, hard working and honest folks who love music and the gear associated with it. Were not out smoking crack and robbing liquor stores......(rant over)
sigh......


Well I did just what you said!
I marched right in and told her all about not drinking, not running around and being hard working.
When the dust settled it seemed I was having the flowers for dinner tonight!!!!!!!!

(never heard of those speakers huh?)

To be brutally honest here.....you can do all of the above things flowers and such but those are only really temporary solutions. Myself, I would sit her down and explain that this is what you are, period. I get really irked at women who give their men a ration of grief regarding this thing we do. Shit man, we could all be out drinking every night, closing down the local taverns and chasing women. Fact is we are not, we are a group of pretty classy, hard working and honest folks who love music and the gear associated with it. Were not out smoking crack and robbing liquor stores......(rant over)
sigh......

I have to agree with you there. I always tell my wife that at least she always knows where I am which is in my listening room, having a beer and listening to music. She laughs and tells me to get a life but she agrees with me. The best thing I ever heard was when my daughter visited with a friend from college and I overheard her friend tell her that you have the coolest parents. I was walking on air and I could see my daughter beaming.. it definitely doesn't get any better than that!

i believe balance is the key, woman love us to have harmless lil toys to play with,but when it appears that they are not numero uno, fourth of july comes early. keep them on that pedestal and feeling that they are the most important thing in your life and bingo you got it made

i believe balance is the key, woman love us to have harmless lil toys to play with,but when it appears that they are not numero uno, fourth of july comes early. keep them on that pedestal and feeling that they are the most important thing in your life and bingo you got it made

I agree, I'll spend some time with her tomorrow, right now I need to run out to another dealer! :banana:
( I wonder where I left the take out food menus? :scratch2: )

Here is my advice:

Pay as much attention to your woman as you do your stereo. You will be rewarded by both.

John

Me? Personally-------- I do not put up with a person who doesn't take me for who I am , this includes my interests..
I'd dump the the ol crow.

Well, I just got back :bash:

So there is only one thing to do, turn up the volume and :beer: .

:banana: :banana: :banana: :banana:

Cableguy was obviously right, and your wife is a rational woman (a rare commodity, indeed). This hobby is relatively harmless, and in many ways edifying. These "things" we covet actually MAKE BEAUTIFUL MUSIC (or ugly music, if that's your preference). Women collect PRECIOUS MOMENTS statuettes, for gawdsakes. They collect dust AND they are completely insipid.

Unfortunately, no good deed goes unpunished, and your good deed in this case was taking her along to see you in action, when she could catch the glint in your eye she remembers seeing when you started dating HER.) Sometimes I get annoyed with my GF for one dopey thing or another, but all I have to do is look around a bit to get my head on straight. If you watch the people around you, and you don't come away saying, "Hallelujah for my SigOth," then there probably really is a problem.

P.S.--From watching my parents' friends growing up, one of the things I learned is that healthy couples have a way of checking each other's excessive behaviors, rather than fostering them. And given the choice between you being out spending the utility money on booze or you being in your shop tinkering with a turntable, I bet your rational wife will choose you at home with her. (per cableguy)

I seldom ever let a week go by with out bring my wife some lovely flowers. Never once have I said no any of her wants unless it was so strange as to test me. The trick is balance in all things that you love. You must make time for all things important in your life or they will suffer. Obsessed that you may well be just added in a few more things into this obsession and then they call you great guy.

If you only have time to answer one question please let me know about the speakers ;) )
LMAO! :lmao: A man has to have his priorities! :lmao:

OK, go for the night out, a nice dinner and some good wine.
That ought to buy you some time tomorrow for some more good music!:D

Me? Personally-------- I do not put up with a person who doesn't take me for who I am , this includes my interests..
I'd dump the the ol crow.
2nd that. Dump her. Plenty of women out there that enjoy
our hobby as much as we do.

To be brutally honest here.....you can do all of the above things flowers and such but those are only really temporary solutions. Myself, I would sit her down and explain that this is what you are, period. I get really irked at women who give their men a ration of grief regarding this thing we do. Shit man, we could all be out drinking every night, closing down the local taverns and chasing women. Fact is we are not, we are a group of pretty classy, hard working and honest folks who love music and the gear associated with it. Were not out smoking crack and robbing liquor stores......(rant over)
sigh......"

I couldn't agree more with this post. My wife started to give me grief shortly after we were married, after we had already had a discussion about the importance of this hobby and muisc in my life....I sat her down for another heart to heart and it was more effective, she may not agree with all that I do but she tries to understand and that for which she can't understand she doesn't say much about, fair enough. As the other post said "this is who I am".

3rd that. DTB.

Some women collect dolls.......Lots of dolls.......
What about stamp collections?
Model train sets?...............
I'm never giving up my love of music again
for any woman........"Any person" to be politically correct..........
Just because they don't share our love of music doesn't mean they
are right and we are wrong................
My "EX"-wife told me once, "I hate music!!! Especially anything with a beat"!
I should have left right then as we were only dating when she told me that.

WHOOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6 AM out here on the east coast and just put on my main system.
Problem is, I forgot I left it on 3/4 volume last night!
I don't think this is going to help my situation. :no:

I can definitely see this being the topic of conversation with family at dinner today as she pleads for help with my addiction. :yes:


:scratch2:

Maybe I'll hit the music room right after dinner today so as to show the family what she goes through.
Yea, that would be the fair thing to do. :D

Are we all in agreement on my strategy?:beatnik:

Dali make some really good speakers.

And I thought I needed a life...

You may want to follow the advice my dad gave about women whe I was a kid. He told me never let a woman see you smile, she will always find away to make your smile go away, unless of course she thinks she put the smile there.

Everybody has their likes and dislikes. I think we can accept that to some extent,that's what makes use different. Obsession though or fanaticism is best if you can limit it to yourself.
I use to belong to a church were this one guy, very intelligent. Would always talk or bring the conversation around linguistics in which he was somewhat of an expert. It was very interesting at times, but over the course of time it wears on you. It is not that I didn't admire the guy, it is just that it was the same thing every time you meet this guy. Please, get off the linguistics and talk about something else for a change.
I was guilty of this obsession myself at one time when I was into gaming. All I would talk about was either chess or wargames.
When it comes to other people especially if your obsessed try not to think of your interests. Focus on their interest, what makes them tick. They know all about your interests.
So in regards to your wife, she knows all about your hobby. You have to stop making this important for her, it's not, its important to you. When it comes to her talk about anything 'cept audio stuff.

Everybody has their likes and dislikes. I think we can accept that to some extent,that's what makes use different. Obsession though or fanaticism is best if you can limit it to yourself.
I use to belong to a church were this one guy, very intelligent. Would always talk or bring the conversation around linguistics in which he was somewhat of an expert. It was very interesting at times, but over the course of time it wears on you. It is not that I didn't admire the guy, it is just that it was the same thing every time you meet this guy. Please, get off the linguistics and talk about something else for a change.
I was guilty of this obsession myself at one time when I was into gaming. All I would talk about was either chess or wargames.
When it comes to other people especially if your obsessed try not to think of your interests. Focus on their interest, what makes them tick. They know all about your interests.
So in regards to your wife, she knows all about your hobby. You have to stop making this important for her, it's not, its important to you. When it comes to her talk about anything 'cept audio stuff.


This very good info and very smart.

Dali make some really good speakers.

And if you've scored the Lamas you have reached musical nirvana!! :D

Hey I get grief from the SO fairly often. I love her to death, but when I point out that she buys 5 thousand kinds of crap for the house I get "But it's your living!"

Whereupon I point out that it wouldn't bother me one bit if, say, a vase wasn't there lol.

The stereo is my domain. Everything else is hers. :)

Pete

The "O" word
by Onepixel

O is for Obsessed, when you can't think of nothing else
O is for Opportunity, when you never let a good one pass
O is for Ornery, when you don't get enough
O is for Orgasm, when the self inflicted ones don't count
O is for Oneness, when you feel at peace with another
O is for One, Quoting Three Dog Night, "Is the loneliest number"

O is for Ovation, what Onepixel shoud get
O is for Out of here, before I get my ass kicked...

I drive taxi for a living and this topic reminds me of the time I picked up this lady. Just for a conversation starter or icebreaker and my sense of humor, I asked the lady if she had watched the hockey game last night (most women could care less about hockey). Well this struck a nerve, how was I to know? She went on a rant " how dare you to talk to me about hockey! that's all my husband talked about during the years they were married." Definitely a taboo subject for her.:smoke:

Women like to "talk about it". Let her. Sooner the better. It disfuses things. IMHO don't go down the compare to this or that road. That's defensive. Just let her talk it out.

Well the dust had settled since I started this thread but as is the nature of life I misstepped again!

So, a few days ago I took my daughter to the mall as my wife worked in the garden. Well of course we never got to the mall as the car veered off route and inexplicably headed to the audio store. Finding ourselves there we decided to go in so I could price the 501's that I have craved the last 6 months. Well push came to shove and we struck a deal. Now here's the thing.
I had them sent right over to the house but my daughter and I stopped for a sandwich. Yes you guessed, the installer got there before us and announced he had a delivery and it was not flowers. About now my daughter and I (who had been sworn to secrecy by now) drive up to find one irate wife and one nervous looking 20 something audio installer. In a flash I realized I had misstepped again and needed to calm things down. Well I did what came naturally, I broke into laughter! You need to picture the scene. This young guy thinking he might be a witness to a major crime, my wife covered in dirt from working in the yard with her head spinning around like on the exorcist and my 12 year old daughter totally unbothered by it all. A real Kodak moment!
I had to share it was truly priceless!

For the record, I am out in Las Vegas the first week of August on business and now I am not going alone; also swearing a kid to secrecy is just like giving a kid a bargaining chip that goes to the highest bidder. :yes:

When I read all this I realise how damn lucky I am to have Lauriann...When we 1st got engaged my mother asked her if she was gonna make me get rid of all those "awful old radios & TVs he collects", & Lauriann, Bless her !-said no, she liked my radios 'n' TVs, & hoped I'd get more...Funny how my mom & sister can drop $7500-10K on a fancy-ass saddle for one of their horses, & that's OK, but let me spend $500 on a Boatanchor, & that's Wasting Money...All depends on who's ox is being gored, I guess...

Wow. Your wife gets mad becauce you have a little father and daughter time and celebrate it bye buying some speakers to remember the moment. Doesn't she understand that you are investing your time and love with your daughter so years from now your daugther can look at the speakers and remember what a nice day she had with her DAD. Yeah that story wouldn't work for me either. But fell free to use it

Wow. Your wife gets mad becauce you have a little father and daughter time and celebrate it bye buying some speakers to remember the moment. Doesn't she understand that you are investing your time and love with your daughter so years from now your daugther can look at the speakers and remember what a nice day she had with her DAD. Yeah that story wouldn't work for me either. But fell free to use it

:lmao::lmao::lmao:

Not bad but had I gone with it I feel the audio guy surely would have been a witness to aggravated assault!:yes:

When visiting Speakerlab in Seattle last year,
I listened to a pair of Dali bookshelves they had hooked up to some Newer NAD gear.I cant remember
the model number,but the sound was impressive.
I do remember a big pricetag-
http://www.dali.dk/us/
An idea-Sell something.Maybe list one of your favorite pieces of gear on CL or the Bay.
It shows your lack of attachment to a material object.
Then shop around for a month or so and buy a piece
of gear youve always wanted.
That shows that you can let go of something you Cherish
and can replace it if you want to.
But then again-Im single.

It's amazing how much of this women will put up with before snapping. I've given up trying to involve my wife in these exploits. It just winds up being me blathering a bunch of jargon when all she wants to know is how to turn it on, if that. They don't care, they can't tell the difference, and pointing out the differences makes them feel dumb. Don't shove the whole thing down her throat and you'll come out better.
For example, I don't change out components in the downstairs rack anymore BECAUSE;
1. the whole family's figured out how to run what's in there.
2. she can't tell when I buy new shit when the rack stays the same.
Dan

Let's face it,men are collectors,hunters.It is as natural to us as nuturing is to women.The difference is hunting costs money

Alan

Here is my advice:

Pay as much attention to your woman as you do your stereo. You will be rewarded by both.

John

well said

Did you ask her if she wanted to go along on your visit to all the dealers? What I mean is would you be really interested in visiting all the dress shops with her?:scratch2: