Bonehead Motorcycle Stunts.

[LBPete]

The recent motorcycle post got me thinking about the good old days when motorcycles were my primary means of transportation. Of course being young, stupid and owning a motorcycle can add up to some interesting stories. So let’s post them here. I don’t want this to become a discussion of blood, guts and motorcycle carnage so lets limit the scope to stories that don’t involve bones being set, hospitalization or mortuaries.

Here’s a personal favorite. I was living in Brooklyn in the mid 1970s and working at a Honda dealership on Staten Island. The door to door distance was no more than 5 or 6 miles but required crossing the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge. This is a big bridge. At the time it was the longest suspension bridge in the world. 10s of thousands of vehicles cross this bridge every day. Like most big bridges, it has a toll. At the time it was $1 each way.

It started out as one round trip a day. In the morning going against traffic it was a rush blasting up the slope of the bridge on my Z1 Kawasaki. The bridge puts you high over the entrance to New York Harbor and view from the upper deck is great. Riding a motorcycle gives you the bonus of smelling the salt air and feeling the sea breeze.

After a while I started dating a girl that lived in Staten Island. That meant I had to go home to clean up before going back to her place to pick her up. More times than not, we would go back to Brooklyn to hang out and then back to her place. It could add up to 6 or 8 trips a day across the bridge. To a kid making $5 or $6 an hour, that added up to serious money.

So I started running the toll at every opportunity. (This was Brooklyn after all). The exact change lane had a basket for coins and an arm that blocked cars from driving trough without paying. The arm was painted with white and bright orange reflective stripes. It raised when the toll was paid and dropped when the car passed. It didn’t reach the far side of the lane so the technique I used was to fake a coin toss and then squirt around the far side of the arm barrier. It worked pretty good.

Now if you have ever ridden a motorcycle through a busy toll booth, you know that cars drop a lot of oil there. The quick stop and acceleration causes any oil drips on the bottom of the car to drop off. On top of that, the tire tracks literally wear down more than the center strip. That forms a big slippery hump in the middle of the lane. This combination made maneuvering the 900cc Kawasaki around the one arm barrier a little hairy at times.

So being a natural born problem solver, I hatched a new technique that didn’t involve crossing the slippery hump. Watching the cars, I decided that if I kept the front wheel of the bike an inch or two from the rear bumper of the car in front, there was enough room to squeeze through before the arm dropped. Sounds so simple, one fine morning, I tried it.

What happened next is etched in my memory like it happened yesterday. With the confidence of an experienced inner city rider, I followed the car though like my front wheel was glued to the car’s bumper. But boy did I miss judge how fast that arm dropped. It came down right on top of the bike’s headlight. Before I could totally realize what was happening, (I was accelerating to keep pace with the car), the arm kind of stuttered up over the top of the gauges, then as I continued to move forward, it slid up my arms and smashed across my chest, pieces flying everywhere.

By this point I’m in a kind of stupor as my brain tries to make sense out of the events of the last couple of seconds. I distinctly remember doing a type of inventory. Wow, that didn’t knock me down, I don’t seem to be hurt, the damn bike is still on it’s wheels and running, holy shit I busted the toll booth arm. As my wits began to return, I noticed the sound of an alarm bell coming from the damaged toll booth. I did what any self respecting biker would do, I gassed it and made the kind of high speed departure the Z1 was born for.

Later when I took my jacket off, there were very obvious white and orange reflective stripes up the arms and across my chest. That would have been very incriminating evidence had I been caught. I don’t remember any damage to the bike. Thankfully, the toll booth arm was clearly designed to break away on impact. I’m guessing I wasn’t the first idiot to challenge it.

- Pete

[Ed in SoDak]

Riding dirt bike in an open, grassy field, I flew by an old open mining pit, missing the edge by inches. It would have been front tire into opposite side and me flying, so I considered myself very lucky.
-Ed

[Donny]

a friend of mine was riding my honda 110 3wheeler,popping wheelies and then let one of the high ones down and crash! Broke the frame! haha it was still running and him sitting on it,no one hurt but it sure was tough getting it out of the woods

[Donny]

ooh and heres one of mine. I was riding dirtbikes with my nephew and here are a few fallen trees,do being the super rider (in my mind) I tell my nephew this is how you cross it! I pop the front wheel over the first tree then when I hit the second tree,the first tree springs up hard and hits my engine gaurd.I pull in the clutch and catch the bike,so I'm standing there but I can't keep my balence in the mud ,my nephew trys to help but doesn't know how and I fall over haha few accendents like this.Most of mine end up at the doctor.

[Rockmonton]

prolly watching my buddy try to outrun the cops on our monster minibike, 23 horses on a 55 pound frame with a 180 pound rider, he was doing pretty good till they got someone ahead of him, couldnt help to stop laughing, all he got was a few hundred dollars in fines.

[Wardsweb]

Not really a stunt, just being stupid to think I could keep up with my buddy who is a Suzuki sponsored racer. I wasn't hurt, other than my pride. I always wear full leathers, gloves, boots and helmet. Had to replace a few pieces on the Busa, note the case ground through and dumped all the oil. Man oh man, what a mess.

http://wardsweb.org/busa/lowside/ls_busa.jpg

[Wornears]

Ah, this is a grand thread. My younger brother tried to outrun the cops on our Honda 50 in 1967. (I was the "good" kid.) He was in 4rd grade and his nascient disrespect for authority was beginning to demonstrate itself in public. The authorities didn't take too kindly to his riding around on a nearby large school playground one summer Saturday (we did it every weekend) and pulled up to the curb and told him to come over.

Of course he goes full throttle (what, 30 mph?) in the opposite direction. Said cops pull up on the playground giving chase with lights and sirens on full-tilt! Now this is getting cool! He leads them merrily around the baseball backstops, football goals, tetherball courts, etc. They are becoming increasing less and less amused at this squirt out-manuevering them in tight quarters, (they don't want to run over him -- probably do but the paperwork would be a bitch), but his mistake is when he takes to the streets to make his way back to our house. We kids head back home. About 15 minutes later, here he comes, pushing the bike up the middle of the street walking alongside, the cop car behind with lights on, neighbors aghast (what have those heathens done now!?) escorting him up to our driveway, whereupon they and my mom have an animated discussion.

They found out where his disrespect for authority originated. At least she didn't get carted off for telling them in no unclear terms she thought it was way out of line to harass her sweet young son up the middle of our street and was surprised they didn't "just shoot him to stop him!" This is the mid-'60s and women weren't supposed to be so assertive. She told them she would handle my brother in no uncertain terms and they certainly believed her and left him at her mercy. It wasn't pretty, but the neighborhood was abuzz for awhile about that escapade. Not the last of his with a motorcycle and motorized police, either.

[ilimzn]

A friend of mine did a similar thing with a souped-up 50cc and a policeman on a BMW motorcycle (with the voxer engine). Well, he flew right down a flight of stairs in a park and between two humongous planters, while the cop left the BMWs cylinders on them...

[Andyman]

Hmmmmmmmmmm.........

Don't try and get aerial cresting a small sand ridge, there may be a 20' dropoff into a swamp on the other side.

Don't go racing down a big tire track from a road grader in the dark, he may have backed out of it.

And finally, (don't try this Kam) a Suzuki T500 gas tank is just wide enough to hold a 6 pack of Pabst Blue ribbon between your thighs.

[Thatch_Ear]

There was a kid in the nieghborhood that was shit hot on a bike. He took me on the back of mine down a trail so fast I about crapped my pants, he was a natural born speeder.
One night he got trashed on beer and was fooling around and the cops got after him. My parents heard the 2 stroke flying around the corner with cop cars after it, run out to the garage and see my bike was there. Big relief for them, but why would they even think it was me?
Anyway it ended up with 5 radios after this guy. 2 cars were totalled, a number of lawns got trashed and they never caught him.
Not knowing about what had just happened another kid was on his bike heading to the Center and when he pulled up to a stop sign he was tackled of his bike by one very pissed off cop.
Meanwhile his mom was going to the Packy to get some more beverage pulls up to where the cops are handcuffing her kid. She hops out all pissed off and doesn't put her car in park (a little buzzed) and her car rolls over the bike.
He ends up being let loose by telling the cops who the real culprit was (it could only have been one guy) but his mom was arrested for DUI.
We were all entertained for weeks talking about it. I missed the whole thing but the high speed chase supposedly lasted over half an hour and there were a lot of pissed off homeowners who got their yards trashed when the cops couldn't take the corners at 50 mph like this kid was doing on that dirt bike. He also cut across yards because there were no fences since the houses were all separated by patches of woods.

[Fisherdude]

1. On a Suzuki X-6 Hustler (anybody remember those??) in a full tuck on a two-lane long straight road, letting it slowly get past 100 mph, when a California Highway Patrol cruiser goes by the other way. Never saw a head swivel so fast. He didn't even turn around.

2. On a great mountain road east of Fresno, CA, towards Yosemite National Park, going waaaay too fast on a Honda CL-77 305 Scrambler. Took a right hand turn I couldn't make, drifted across the center line, then saw a big logging truck coming the other way. Trucker's eyes were as big as saucers as I kept going to the outside of the curve, finally completely across the road and onto the far shoulder as the logging truck want past. Learned lesson #4 that day.

3. Keep in mind this was a long time ago, before we all got a lot smarter. Going home from a party during college, so drunk I couldn't stand up. Laying face down across the gas tank of a Harley Sportster with my chin propped up on the gas cap. 100+ down Herndon Avenue. I have no memory of how I got home.

4. Zero-110 mph on a Kawasaki in a single block in a 35 mph zone in front of Fresno State.

It's a miracle I'm still alive. :no:

[rew15951]

A friend and I were adjusting the carb. slides on my 350 yamaha while it was sitting on a milk crate in a little one car shack, put the slides back in, reached down and started the bike with the kick starter by hand. well the slides were stuck full throttle bike fell of the milk crate and hit shifter lever knocking it in gear at full throttle MY GOD IT WAS AWFUL !

[rew15951]

One morning after a night of heavy drinking I decided to load my dirt bike in the truck that was parked in the car port. put the ramp on the tailgate and went for it. well the side of the car port was way to low, wiped me off the bike and the front wheel of the bike ended up in back window of the pickup.

[rew15951]

Then there was the episode with the experimentel wheeley bars. that didn't turn ot so well for me either. but I better stop here and give some one else a chance !

[rew15951]

Buying A Hodaka Combat Wombat

[Donny]

A friend of mine jumped a sweet looking hill ,real good launch too! I was back a ways behind him and was gonna do the same thing! till I saw him flying without the bike!!! He bailed cause it was a huge drainage ditch on the other side. haha so it was kdx fishing day with tie downs btw 6foot deep water his bro also rode off through the same ditch when he couldn't make a turn,atleast it was only about 3feet deep at that end...

[Yamaha B-2]

Having a bit too much of the good stuff and then forgetting that my CB-450 would not stop so well on the grassy backyard. Slide all the way down the yard next to the garage and through the wife's vegatable garden before hitting the fence at the end. Nothing damaged other than the plants. But, most embarassing. Even at 23.

[LPD]

Being an avid trials rider, there is always an opportunity to talk about stupid stunts ect.

Last weekend I had attempted this rock obstacle for my fourth time in my entire riding. Its a mental glitch or something, but everytime I attempt this peice it kicks my @#$@#. Basically you are coming to the crest of a long hill climb and at the top is a two foot log to hop over.....no problem...I nail that one almost every time. I blip over the log and about six feet from the log is this rock wall. Picture this if you will.....

It runs up at a gentler slope (60 degrees) for about six feet and dips in then becomes almost vertical (80 + degrees) for about another ten feet and at the top is a two foot underhang. A real nail biter!! :D

I know from my previous attempts that I need all the momentem I can get and then some so I give the throttle a good crack. I hit the lower part of the slope and literally it becomes a kicker and I'm launched to the underhang (this I didn't expect). Unfortunately I didn't have enough weight on the front end and I began to topple over backwards.

Lucky for me I've attempted this beast enough times to know I need a spotter and he grabs the front end of the bike and pull it down before it flips right over. I on the otherhand slide down the rock face virtually unscathed!!!

Moral of the story....I think I might need help... I can't stop!!!

Rock wall 4 Peter 0

Stayed tuned as I'm going to try and even the score a little today!! :naughty:

[Donny]

Good Luck LPD!

[LPD]

Rock wall 4 Peter 1 :banana:

[LBPete]

There was a kid in the nieghborhood that was shit hot on a bike. He took me on the back of mine down a trail so fast I about crapped my pants, he was a natural born speeder.
One night he got trashed on beer and was fooling around and the cops got after him. My parents heard the 2 stroke flying around the corner with cop cars after it, run out to the garage and see my bike was there. Big relief for them, but why would they even think it was me?
Anyway it ended up with 5 radios after this guy. 2 cars were totalled, a number of lawns got trashed and they never caught him.
Not knowing about what had just happened another kid was on his bike heading to the Center and when he pulled up to a stop sign he was tackled of his bike by one very pissed off cop.
Meanwhile his mom was going to the Packy to get some more beverage pulls up to where the cops are handcuffing her kid. She hops out all pissed off and doesn't put her car in park (a little buzzed) and her car rolls over the bike.
He ends up being let loose by telling the cops who the real culprit was (it could only have been one guy) but his mom was arrested for DUI.
We were all entertained for weeks talking about it. I missed the whole thing but the high speed chase supposedly lasted over half an hour and there were a lot of pissed off homeowners who got their yards trashed when the cops couldn't take the corners at 50 mph like this kid was doing on that dirt bike. He also cut across yards because there were no fences since the houses were all separated by patches of woods.Thatch’s post reminded me of a guy in the neighborhood that called himself The Duke. He was a borderline sociopath, long on attitude and short on brains. The Duke and the guys he hung with rode Harleys. They were as much a fashion statement then as they are now. The style at the time was a modified chopper with plated frames, longer fork legs, very narrow bars and “peanut” tanks. They were a chore to ride in traffic and the guys that had them rode them like a badge of honor. They were real kidney busters but since they only held a gallon or two of gas, they didn’t have much range and required frequent stops.

In any case The Duke and his friends are out riding and the cops pull the group over, well at least The Duke pulled over. The rest of the guys took off. The Duke wound up with a ticket or two and was pissed. Some time goes by and they are out riding again and the cops pull the group over again. The Duke decides he’s not going to be the fall guy and takes off. The rest of the guys pull over. The cops start chasing The Duke.

They chased him up the Belt Parkway at high speed in a full blown pursuit. They eventually caught him in a dramatic roadblock type situation. Wound up tackling him and subduing him physically. Needless to say they threw the book at him.

Now what you need to picture is how a sociopath would look at this situation. I heard him explain it like he was doing nothing wrong and the cops were totally unreasonable. What would the cops expect, he got the ticket the first time, he was totally within his rights to split the next time. I had to keep from laughing when he ran down the list of tickets he got, criticizing the cops judgement on each one. “They gave me a ticket for having a brake light out, at least the bike has a brake light!” “Those bastards gave me a ticket for not signaling when changing lanes!! They’re chasing me at 100 mph and they expect me to take a hand off the bars to give them a hand signal?"

- Pete