View Full Version : Cliff Clavin's Theory about beer- braincells like buffalo

01-16-2007, 11:21 PM
Cliff Clavin's (from Cheers) Buffalo Theory about beer-

One night at Cheers, Cliff Clavin explained the " Buffalo theory" to his buddy Norm:
"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine!

That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

01-16-2007, 11:49 PM
Yup, Cliffie knew his stuff.

01-17-2007, 01:26 AM
.....the dry humor displayed on Cheers' episodes was exceptional....the best sitcom ever, imo..... episode Carla had just taken up with a new boyfriend, and wanted to borrow Dianne's closeby apartment to check him out, so to speak....Dianne finally agreed and held out her apartment keys to Carla and said, "and when you're through, just burn everything"....anyhow, Carla took the keys and headed out the door with her new guy....later, Coach came out of a back room and heard the conversation about Carla being gone to have sex with the guy....Coach knew the guy and gasped....he told everyone the guy had a serious heart condition....everyone then gasped....Sam said someone needed to get on the phone and call Carla to stop the activity....everyone agreed, but no one knew exactly what to say....Norm spoke up and said, "just tell her to look at the next pillow over and count the dead people"......

01-17-2007, 08:54 AM
Cheers was a well-written show, and I miss it.

Woody: How are you feeling today, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Poor.
Woody: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Norm: No, I meant `pour'.
-- Cheers, Strange Bedfellows, Part 3

Woody: Hey, Mr. Peterson, what's the story?
Norm: Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy gets another beer.
-- Cheers, The Proposal

Paul: Hey Norm, how's the world been treating you?
Norm: Like a baby treats a diaper.
-- Cheers, Tan 'n Wash