Again, folks, it's not 'customs fees' that Canada charges, it is sales tax. There is supposed to be a $60CAD floor,
for gifts, below which sales tax is not collected. If the item is not marked gift, or has a value of greater than $60CAD, then 13% sales tax will be charged. The fee for collecting and forwarding that money is where FedEx and, to a lesser degree, UPS ding you. CanadaPost, which delivers shipments that originated with USPS, charges $5.95 for this fee.
Andy, FedEx only charges back to the shipper if the consignee refuses to pay the bill, which FexEx mails out. UPS usually collects at the door, unless they were foolish enough to leave it without collecting. That happened to me, years ago. They may be better at this, now.
If you are shipping to a city near the border you can have it sent to a ups store and they can drive it right over the boarder
Not everyone can drive across the border, for various reasons. A DUI, for example, or other conviction, within the last 10 years, will keep you from crossing. No passport, no out-of-province medical coverage, no driver's license, any of these, or others, as well, will have the same effect.