Write a Limerick

[harman/kardon]

Ole tee vee Nuz' plaque is very fine,
This one is absolutely mine!
So I will print it
And I will frame it,
And raise to you all a glass of wine!

 

[old_tv_nut]

I think the best is pesto pasta.
It makes me eat my pasta fasta.
But also, I like marinara -
Give me either, I don't care-a.
Neither is, to me, disasta.

 

[bobsvinyl]

Spaghetti sauce makes my head hurt.
I'm careful but it gets on my shirt.
Try to remove the stain
It can be a real pain
If you also add on some dessert.

 

[likebike23]

As an Italian, I can relate.
Pesto and marinara are great.
But the meal's not complete,
without wine, bread, and meat.
That's a recipe for a clean plate!

 

[old_tv_nut]

Eating pasta can be neat
If you twirl SLOWLY before you eat.
But just create centrifugal force
And your shirt will get splashed of course
And some may end up on your feet.

 

[likebike23]

Youse guys need-a the trick
to make-a gravy no drip?
Use-a tha spoon with tha fork,
don't-a twirl with too much torque.
And never eat it with-a chopstick.

 

[bobsvinyl]

If a genie gave three wishes to me,
I would be happy as someone could be.
War and aggression would fall
with food and water for all,
LS50s would be wish number three.

 

[Man in Cave]

Sassy made a great nit picker
Picking at nits she drew quicker
Than a clever debate
Never willing to wait
Chose instead to ever bicker

S.J.

 

[old_tv_nut]

Today's National Limerick Day
So don't let your chance slip away.
See what you can do
With a limerick or two
In your most humorous way.

https://www.nationaldaycalendar.com/days-2/national-limerick-day-may-12/

 

[harman/kardon]

Today's International Mother's Day
So don't let your chance slip away.
See what you can do
With a present or two
Expressing love in a nicely way.

DNU

Sorry for stealing half of your Limerick!

DNU

 

[bobsvinyl]

My Mom's been gone for several years.
Thoughts of her love has brought me to tears.
She was always there for me
With great advice that was free
And helped me through my childhood fears.

 

[DonQuixote99]

Today's International Mother's Day
So don't let your chance slip away.
See what you can do
With a present or two
Expressing love in a nicely way.

DNU

Sorry for stealing half of your Limerick!

DNU

DNU

Amateurs copy; professionals steal.

DNU

 

[Man in Cave]

Inspired in part by the music and words of Have Gun Will Travel: Theme of Paladin
Admittedly the TV show was before my time, but not by much. No offense intended to all the great women-folk AK'ers out there. This one is for you too.

Have song will listen in The Cave of a 'man
Beverage of choice in the palm of the hand
Where we sit in the spot so sweet
Raise a glass to the rumblin' beat
Proudly toast A Kinship shared across this land

"Have gun will travel, reads the card of a man"
I find the first line of the this vintage theme song a particularly relevant metaphor in today's society. That something's been lost.

S.J.

 

[old_tv_nut]

Today's International Mother's Day
So don't let your chance slip away.
See what you can do
With a present or two
Expressing love in a nicely way.

DNU

Sorry for stealing half of your Limerick!

DNU

Retribution is something you should not fear
For repeating words that I wrote here.
You've succeeded in your intent
To express a splendid sentiment,
And imitation is flattery most sincere.

 

[old_tv_nut]

A lady once hired an electrician
To measure the volts in her kitchen.
The moment she kissed him,
She couldn't resist him.
'Twas the cause of her current condition.

 

[Man in Cave]

Memorial Day 2017

Always I'll owe the fallen a defrayal of debt
Who fought for me with neither persuasion nor regret
I rather humbly say thank you
I pray you watch over me too
Am I worthy of the freedom you've sown that I've spent?

S.J.

 

[old_tv_nut]

Breathes there a man with soul so dead
Who never to himself has said
There's nothing happening here I see
And so I guess it's up to me
To try to wake up this old thread?

 

[Hyperion]

A flea and a fly in a flue,
Were imprisoned, so what could they do?
Said the fly, "Let us flee!"
"Let us fly," said the flea,
And they flew through a flaw in the flue.

 

[Hyperion]

There once was a barmaid named Gail,
On whose breast was written the price of the ale.
And on her behind, (for the sake of the blind,)
Was the same information in Braille.

 

[old_tv_nut]

There once was a witch in Khartoum
Who got tired of her old-fashioned broom.
But you've never seen her
On her new vacuum cleaner,
For the line cord will reach just one room.