I sympathize with you. Luckily I do not have a "hook up" (I'm in Birmingham also and now I'm wondering where you get your stuff!) or I'd be in the same boat. I have bought too much stuff since getting into this hobby about a year ago. I could get it all on a very large utility shelf (probably), so it isn't lining my garage walls or anything, but it's still way too much, and all of the stuff I have is middle of the road at best. It's not even really good stuff. The "PITA to have it laying around/actual $ value of my stuff" ratio is pretty high. My dad loved going to flea markets and thrift stores, and I think that's where my hunter instinct comes from as well, but it's limited to stereo stuff. I don't buy everything I see, but I have a hard time walking away from something if it's a good deal. My biggest weakness is cd players...I have no idea why, but I love buying them. Probably because they are cheap and readily available. Luckily I rarely happen upon desirable speakers, because those things can occupy a lot of real estate quickly. Thing is, I don't NEED a dang bit of it. I didn't even own anything better than an iPod docking station up until a year ago, and that was frankly good enough to fulfill my needs at the time, yet now I've convinced myself that I HAVE to have all this stereo stuff. It's just silly. Subconsciously it is almost a relief when I go into a store and don't buy anything. There's almost disappointment when I DO find something because then I have to figure out where I'm going to put it and/or what it's going to replace.
I've been able to walk away from some stuff by telling myself that I need to leave it for someone else to enjoy. I've walked away from stuff only to go back and buy it. I find myself always thinking about acquiring stereo stuff, and I HAVE to get out of that mindset. Your line about not being able to enjoy your stuff hit home, because my man cave is where all my stereo stuff is. I can walk around and sit, don't get me wrong, but I don't even like being in there right now. There's an old receiver in the floor with the cover off (which I'm not even qualified to fix, which makes me roll my eyes even more at its presence), the closet doors reveal old receivers and a few sets of speakers, and there's AV wires and stuff scattered around. It is just clutter and it makes me sick and ashamed of myself. I've got a nook under the stairwell in the garage where I've put stuff, and it's starting to fill up. My wife doesn't give me a hard time, but I kind of wish she would.
Anyway, I'm thankful to have read your post. Reality has been slapping me in the face lately, and I'm hoping to nip this crap in the bud before it gets too out of hand. The only way I think I will keep things reasonable is just to quit going "hunting." That's my #1 problem. I think that's what you are going to need to do too. Try to limit your visits to thrifts, scanning CL ads, etc. I'm going to try to limit my trips to the store, and try to limit my purchases when I do go. I know I likely won't knock it out completely so I'm being realistic. I'm going to start throwing away some of the stuff I have that I can't fix, and donate some of the other stuff that's just marginal equipment, and chalk it up to a bad investment. I've sold stocks at a loss before...this isn't much different, except stocks never took up an entire closet in my man cave. I don't know your financial situation, but I'd suggest you build some small systems, post them on CL for a month, and whatever you don't sell, just donate it, chalk it up as a bad investment, and move on with life. Our happiness and sanity is more important than a bunch of thrift store stereo gear, and certainly personal relationships are more important as well. This is supposed to be a hobby, and it's supposed to be fun, and certainly not a burden. Right now it feels like a burden for me. I'm glad you shared your story, and I wish the both of us luck.