Firesign Theater Quotes

Jim Eck

Chicks dig the Mule
I have noticed several Firesign Theater quotes lately. I wasn't sure any of us could remember those years. Thought it might be fun to start a Firesign Theater quote thread.

I will start off with,

"Bear Whiz Beer, 'like my Daddy always said, son its in the water, that's why it's yellow.'"

"Bear Whiz Beer liquid products Animal Missouri."

Jim:beer: :beerchug:
 
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Porgy....Tirebiter

He's a spy and a girl delighter,

Porgy, he's a student like you....

Like me? He's a student like you....

Porgy?!

(heavy, sexual breathing)

COOOMMMMMIIIIIINNNNNGGGGG MOTHER!



shrinkboy

listened obsessively to FST through the late 60's, earliest 70's
 
"Hiya, friends! Ralph Spoilsport, Ralph Spoilsport Motors - the world's largest new used and used new automobile dealership - Ralph Spoilsport motors - right here in the city of EMPHYSEMA! Let's just look at the extras on this fabulous car! Wire-wheel spoke fenders and two-way sneeze through wind vents, star-studded mud guard, sponge-coated edible steering column, chrome fender dents - and factory air conditioned air from our fully factory-equipped air conditioned factory! It's a beautiful car friends, with doors to match! Birch's Blacklist says this automobile was stolen, but for you friends a complete price: only two-ninety-five hundred dollars in easy monthly payments of twenty dollars a week , twice a week and never on Sunday!"
 
The Whisperin' Squash[singing]:

Back from the Shadows again !
Out where an In-jun's your friend!
Where the veg'tables are green,
And you can pee into the stream!
Yes, we're back from the Shadows again!

Reprise (Whisperin' with others):
We're goin' back to the Shadows again !
Out where an Indian's your friend!
Where the vegetables are green,
And you can pee right into the stream!
(And that's important!)
We're back from the Shadows again!
 
Scene....A high school pep rally......



(principal Poop)...We think that is a fair ,and a wise guy..er...rule, to be guided by..

(student in audience)...What is reality?

(Poop)...and were not afraid of it ..are we??....

(student)....Eat it!!...

(poop).....You bet!

(student)....Eat it raw...

(poop).....raw...raw...raw....thats the spirits we have here

(poop)....So c'mon kids

(Student) ...f*ck you

(Poop)..line up ...sign up ..and renlist today!!...

Thank you ....and F*ck you too!!...




Scene...a game show ...with audience.....


(anouncer)........So heres your last deal Ms. Presky...now... which would would you rather do..........hit this dude over the head with a bag of sugar ...or beat out that rythm on the drums...


(Woman).......Er....ahhhhh....I'll take the bag


(anouncer)........You mean your gonna trade this four foot cube of 18 carrot Swiss Buollion ...........and the snake knives Mrs. Presky ........all for that little bag ....

(woman)........yea...

(anouncer........well alllllright!!...open it up!!.....

(woman).........why...why this is a bag of chit....

(anouncer)...........but its really great chit ...Mrs Presky......
 
Looseners, the ALL weather breakfast cereal!

Don't get me started on this, I listen to them in the car while stuck in traffic. People stare at me (more than usual I mean) for laughing so hard.

Spreeeak Engrish troop!

Anthony
 
You can believe me...because I never lie .......and I'm always right!!


(paid for by the Tirebiter for political soultions committy...sector 'R')
 
"Oh boy grump cakes again, heavy on the thirty weight."

"No, no don't eat with your hands use your entrenching tools."
 
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